“I’ve decided that my dream man is no shorter than Michael Jackson (he was 5’9 1/2)”, Pam age 16.
THIS is where it all began. Sure men have mastered the art of building and deciding that there is a perfect woman and they spend a lot of time looking at her and judging us by those delusional standards but this is 2015 and women have quickly caught up and now we must learn the harsh lesson they have…
THIS IS NOT THE NORM!! Yet THIS is what what we all want in our lives, lol
It’s been a process for me to make amends with my pettiness and broaden my scope as to what attracts me and it’s been touch and go at best, lol lol It’s taken me a minute and to reconcile the following things:
1. AGE – whew Lawd I’m grown now and all that young sweet thang has went by the wayside. I give props to Jackie Jackson for helping me work through the fact that a 50+ year old man is someone I am attracted to.In a fit of joy I added to my 16 year old statement that “I shall date no one OLDER than Mike would have been and that’s 57)
2. BODY TYPE – Ok so ya’ll know I have and continue to beat myself into physical shape and so I’ve been looking at men at the gym and it has dawned on me as Brothers are dropping dead at these young ages and I’ve become conscious of that and the fact that I’mma need Bro to want to LIVE to the best of his ability. Now do you need to be doing tough mudder? No, cause I’m not getting up and do drills cause you on one, can we sit and watch TV for awhile, lol HOWEVER, I’mma need you fit, whether it be natural or exercise induced and that’s my preference and I’m sticking to it. Oh and I need you grown man big, I kinda like that 190-220 on them and…me
3. SKIN TONE – Ok, I’m good. Yes my first look goes to the Brother who I can only see his teeth with the lights out at this point in my life, but I have brought back in the caramel brother, yes I have, lol
4. CULTURE – This one is interesting because I’ve always been of the school of thought that the only man who can understand this descendent of slavery is a man who has the same background and I’ve never really even looked at my say Caribbean and African Brother. Besides, sometimes culture clash can outweigh color, BUT I’m starting to soften on that, I might learn something.
5. COIF – Bald appeals to me, Nice smooth lines on a hair cut appeal to me, I still am not really here for long locs, but textured twists and I am a black man love me extra hair might work. I mean sometimes they are attached to really great creative souls.
and finally..the stickler
4. HEIGHT – Ok, so Atlanta is full of shorty doo wop. They be bopping around this town jumping up on curbs and what not like they running stuff……I have tried and I have stood next to the 5’6 and 5’7 Brother – it’s so difficult ya’ll! I am of the Teddy Pendergrass school of relationships..”Come Here Woman!” if I can look you in the eye, it’s just not effective, lol lol Lord give me strength.
Look, we all have preferences and a lot of them are so far to the left and we all look at each other and go ‘you way too picky’ while making our own petty ass list. In theory, the someone who loves, respects and cherishes you works, in reality, you want him 6 feet, 190-220, medium to dark and able to throw you against a wall. Well at least that’s me…..